Brain Flatulance: tha Video Professor--A Review

[zyzzyva57]

Well, I took the plunge and am trying his FREE sampler "TV Evangelism"

The Professor starts with the basics of being a good evangelist using "Revelation" and working out from there...The Prof stresses often "Motivate by Fear!"...(Tip of his to the Wise: "It is 'Revelation' and not 'RevelationS', hmmm..."

"Prayer offering are important in this field--Not donation$!..Filthy lucre is merely the means to the end of ultimately having a mega "tent"--size in this business does count, he says at one time, with that winsome "I know" TV grin of his...

The Video Professor, using your computer, works through the Bible to build your TV ministry on:

He is no fan of "Leviticus"--"It is like preaching from a law book," he says...

"Ezekiel," he explains is always good, because the Professor says, the book is one of the few books people have heard of and this book hints at flying saucers as well as the food sections are good (e.g., 4:12-15)

"Song of Solomon," he shyly grins, "is for those quiet, reflective moments with a member or two of the flock who need one-on-one help and along with Ezekiel 16:17 may help some between visits..."

And so on through the Bible...

For homework he has you watch a lot of TBN to see how the pros do it (I am starting small with raising the dead by trying to raise the stock market, so pray for me, because it is tough...I get the market up and she dies again--not good for the donations--oops, sorry, Professor, I, of course, meant Prayer Offerings!)

For lab, he sends you to the woods to scream at trees--I got arrested by a forest ranger, incidently, and am now on the U.S. Forest Service's "Arbor Offender" list! I am not allowed within 300-feet of a national forest tree! Geez!

All in all, thumb up on the Video Professor--I want to try his eBay CD to augment my income until I can raise the stock market!

[oldboldpilot]

Do me a favor and when you feel you are ready, see if you can do something about my PSA. I recently had a prostate biopsy and it was benign but I think I need some devine intervention to help thwart the big C. I don't wanna lose no more body parts, thank you. If you're in need of contributions, I would be happy to subscribe to the dollar a year plan ! Halleluyah and amen bro !

[zyzzyva57]

My dear, dear friend, the Big C is horrible, so stick with your doctors--Lost my Mom to colon-rectal cancer last week--needless to say moi is foregoing televangelistic healing for the plain jane Colonoscopy--Suddenly, moi thanks sticking up his behind for one and all to fiddle with is much more better than dignity

Besides, unfortunately, I am still at the stage of sneaking out and learning how to heal trees, if the forest service would leave me alone! Weird, we televangelist can scream at people and slap them around to "heal," but not trees--positively weird, I must opine

In the weeks ahead, moi will be attempting to raise the dead stock market, so wish me success and send me a Love Offering

TBN is a hoot!

I swear last week one of its star screamers bragged on raising the dead

Freigtening their followers can vote, own weapons, get driver's licenses, and breed

[Svenwulf]

Condolences zyzzy.

Thinking good thoughts your way oldbold- everyday medicine makes miracles.

[zyzzyva57]

Thank you

Ruffer than Cramer's sharp stick in the eye saying (Think his Mom died from cancer, too)

Lot of good people helped

Seeing up close and personal what removing life support is all about provided several unique Learning Moments for me

Sad though Passive Euthanasia is legal if it is physical issue with someone, but not if it is mental, a la Alzheimer's disease--Lot families and love ones so needless suffer for years--Cancer from the pits of hell at least does not drag on for years...

Hospice folks at first did not catch my humor when I asked if the Video Professor had a DVD :)

I am one big fan of hospice!