Just venting, terrible terrible tragedy

[Rich]

:confused:The last few years have been tough on our family, but today was a really low point and shock.

Yesterday at about 7pm I set out to go to Cleveland, and all of a sudden our local police came around the corner and was doing 90 in our 35 mph zone, I've never seen Doug drive like that before. Then this morning my brother calls me up and told me the dreadful news.

An old (past) friend of mine who lives just two miles from me shot his wife at 7pm last night and then killed himself four hours later, and two of the three children (17 and 12), were present. My daughter was last years local 2007 Queen of the town and Toms daughter was second runner up on the 2008 Queens court, we were knitted by friendship and also by festival responsibilities, so this touch's a lot of people in our community. My daughter is really shaken about this.

http://sanduskyregister.com/articles/2008/03/15/front/645728.txt

Updated:
http://sanduskyregister.com/articles/2008/03/15/front/645751.txt

From what I have heard from credible sourses; Tom started choking his wife and the two kids tried to break them apart and Tom pushed them into the wall, then yelled to his wife "I'm going to kill you" and pulled out a gun. The oldest daughter ran out to call 911 from the car and the phones battery was dead, so she went to the neighbors home and called from there. When she went back outside they heard the gunshot, mom was dead............ just seconds later cops showed up and Tom took refuge in his garage and called his boss. Tom stated that he just "couldn't take it any more". I guess the two of them separated and why she went over to his home I don't know. Everyone in town knew Tom, he NEVER raised his voice, was always calm and a nice guy, he would do anything for anyone. His wife was a strong personality but thats all I know of her.

Life is so fragile. Huge your wife/husband and kids tonight, you have no assurances of what may come ...

I dred the funneral, I've never experienced feelings and emotions like this before. Our little town of 600 people are tight and this is difficult for so many, especially our school kids. My heart is torn for the kids, this is such a difficult thing....

Later
Rich

[blaster]

That indeed is a sad story Rich. I hope those kids recover from this terrible terrible shock. It will be hard for them for quiet sometime and might linger on for the rest of their lives.

Some basic good old values in general in the western culture have disappeared over time and are vanishing day by day. There are couples where wives still take off their hubbies shoes after he returns from work...then their are those who argue for weeks over a steak being over cooked....
But life has changed over last few decades financial, media and school system.....too much stress work and money.......some people find it so easy to say i just cant take it any more huh.....

[Thierry Martin]

Rich, you have my sympathies, I am sorry to hear about this horrible event and it must be so hard for everyone concerned. It is unfortunate that so many believe the easiest way to solve problems is through violence.

[aiki14]

Hey Rich,
Nothing anyone can say can alleviate the shock and sorrow you must feel at this moment. Grief will work it's way through your system in your own way.
I would advise you to offer counsel and comfort as you can to the survivors, and to your children who will be no doubt troubled by this. Professional counsel will most likely be available at your children's school, let them know it's not a bad thing to make use of it.
My sincerest condolences go out to you and your family, and the survivors of this tragedy.
To everyone else, remember the fragility of our existence. Cherish that what you have and those around you. Know that stress is a demon, and have strategies to combat it.

[Rich]

To everyone else, remember the fragility of our existence. Cherish that what you have and those around you. Know that stress is a demon, and have strategies to combat it.


I'm doing ok, I wasn't that close to Tom and only met his wife a few times. My daughter is doing OK too, shes at college in Tennessee and is somewhat separated from this reality.

It was reported today that Tom may have killed his wife in front of 14 year old~! Lord, what could she have done to cause him to do that! The sheriff says we may never know, but thats a lie, the kids were there and saw possibly everything. I hate to say it, but I suspect that she was there for one thing, to get things 'her way', and sadly pushed Tom over the edge. They were going through a divorce and she still dragged him to every community event.

Just read a different newpaper and it reports that he did murder his wife in front of the 14 year old and they were separated but temporarily living together. Oh, that poor 14 year old!
http://www.morningjournal.com/site/news.cfm?newsid=19396582&BRD=1699&PAG=461&dept_id=46371&rfi=6

Like Aiki stated, Cherish what you have and those around you.
I'd like to add:
HUGE YOUR KIDS AND MATE and make things right amoung those in your family. Life is fragile!!

Thanks everyone
Rich

[Jelly]

Rich,

Very sad news. There but for fortune, go I.

I hope time will be your friend on this.


*We had two murders in our area but with no personal ties. Still, social trends seem to be going downhill. Stay the course, k?

** Out of respect, I omitted my "signature"

[Keventerprises]

:confused:The last few years have been tough on our family, but today was a really low point and shock.

Yesterday at about 7pm I set out to go to Cleveland, and all of a sudden our local police came around the corner and was doing 90 in our 35 mph zone, I've never seen Doug drive like that before. Then this morning my brother calls me up and told me the dreadful news.

An old (past) friend of mine who lives just two miles from me shot his wife at 7pm last night and then killed himself four hours later, and two of the three children (17 and 12), were present. My daughter was last years local 2007 Queen of the town and Toms daughter was second runner up on the 2008 Queens court, we were knitted by friendship and also by festival responsibilities, so this touch's a lot of people in our community. My daughter is really shaken about this.

http://sanduskyregister.com/articles/2008/03/15/front/645728.txt

Updated:
http://sanduskyregister.com/articles/2008/03/15/front/645751.txt

From what I have heard from credible sourses; Tom started choking his wife and the two kids tried to break them apart and Tom pushed them into the wall, then yelled to his wife "I'm going to kill you" and pulled out a gun. The oldest daughter ran out to call 911 from the car and the phones battery was dead, so she went to the neighbors home and called from there. When she went back outside they heard the gunshot, mom was dead............ just seconds later cops showed up and Tom took refuge in his garage and called his boss. Tom stated that he just "couldn't take it any more". I guess the two of them separated and why she went over to his home I don't know. Everyone in town knew Tom, he NEVER raised his voice, was always calm and a nice guy, he would do anything for anyone. His wife was a strong personality but thats all I know of her.

Life is so fragile. Huge your wife/husband and kids tonight, you have no assurances of what may come ...

I dread the funeral, I've never experienced feelings and emotions like this before. Our little town of 600 people are tight and this is difficult for so many, especially our school kids. My heart is torn for the kids, this is such a difficult thing....

Later
Rich

I'm sorry to hear that Rich,
I wish those negative people would put their negative energy where it would be more constructive, in Washington. Some a**hole killed John Lennon instead of several other worthy candidates.

Kudos to Aiki. Well said on working through in you own way, grief is an ancient traditionally recognized process.

[netwrangler]

Rich,

It is, indeed, a slender thread that holds us on course in life.
It is frightening how quickly life can change as a result of a seemingly random event.

Please stay attached to your own slender thread, Rich;
and know that you have some real support resources available through members of the OTF.
You have only to ask.

With heartfelt thoughts,

Net

[Rich]

Thanks all,

Went to the viewing, I've never seen so many cars/people at a funeral. The next day they had about 100 cars packed full of morners. IT went really well, the two familes are getting along.

Thanks all
Rich